Monday, April 8, 2013

Feeling Senseless

I worked five long years to get where I am today and somehow, some way, it seems I've lost my sense of humor.  I haven't really laughed at anything lately, and I need to get my groove back.

I wouldn't be surprised if it's because I'm working what appears to be 24/7.  I leave my house at 7:30 am and get home around 6 pm.  I spend the day with really disturbed people - people who are mentally ill.  And I think it's getting me down.

I miss the bus, I miss the subway.  I miss the interaction with all kinds of people - the crazy ones and the normal ones.  I feel like I barely survived Passover, and didn't spend nearly enough time with my family.

It's all about engaging with your environment, and I've been substituting chocolate bars for engagement.  Not that I'm giving up chocolate, G-d forbid, but maybe I should cut down. Get back on the treadmill.  Smile more often.

It's weird to say, but I've gone from being a student to being an adult in a matter of 6 months.  Like being a kid forced to mature.  Wouldn't you know it - I couldn't wait to be where I am now and now I wish I were where I was then.  I miss my friends, who are all busy too.

Sigh.  Smile.  This kid, no doubt, will be alright.

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